Existential Psychology and Meaning

There are an array of Existential Philosophies, some of which we will cover here.

Definition: Existential

The term Existential is the closest in English to the original German philosophy. However, the original terminology in German roughly translates to "becoming" in English. Becoming differs simply from life's meaning, highlighting two interrelated components of Existential psychology: in our "becoming" we both have to self-actualize and experience meaning.

Meaning

Continuum: Nihilism to Capital "M" Meaning

While maybe an oversimplification, we can consider Nihilism to be on one end of a continuum with capital "M" meaning on the other.

Nihilism is the belief there is no meaning. Some experience this as depressing. Some experience this notion as freeing. And yet others see this through the lens of absurdism: we toil throughout life as if there is importance while we are but a speck in time, undoubtedly to be forgotten - why should we need to be meaningful?

A Man Said to the Universe

By Stephen Crane

A man said to the universe:

“Sir, I exist!”

“However,” replied the universe,

“The fact has not created in me

A sense of obligation.”

Capital "M" meaning refers to the notion that there is true, objective meaning. That there is a universal answer to meaning in life.

This is important as it is in contrast to the notion of subjective meaning: that what is meaningful may differ from person-to-person. As a practitioner of psychology, I often wonder about the subjectivity of meaning. While I relate to some of the nihilistic notions, such as objective absurdism - that there is no evidence human's are important in the universe or, from a religious perspective, divinely (while many religious people experience a "sense" that gives them faith, part of faith is maintaining that belief despite of objective evidence) - I also personally find great meaning in life, but I don't presume other's find the same meaning. However, maybe they do? If you've read other posts of mine, you'll know I find meaning in relationships. Maybe that is objectively what is meaningful?

Meaning Making

Another factor is whether we make meaning, find meaning, or simply have to recognize it right in front of our nose (a sort of mindfulness). I tend to think we have some onus for the meaning in our life, but the notion of going out there and finding it by some sort of effort doesn't sit well with me: those who are depressed with a sense of meaninglessness tend to try too hard already and leaning in further, as if it is a failure by lack of effort or not being good enough, is quite clearly, in my eyes and experience, not accurate. Rather, they often need to put a rest to their toil and recognize the meaning in front of them. Open themselves to the experience of meaning - accept themselves and open themselves to relationships. Not through some objective accomplishment that is externally lauded - that shifts us from intrinsic to extrinsic motivations and values, and meaning is typically then lost. You can see the irony in this: forcefully and effortfully seeking meaning blinds us to it - a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Actualizing

The other component of Existential philosophy if actualizing. Again, extrinsic motivations can occlude our true values, qualities and intrinsic motivations. If we think (have internalized) that actualization is objective accomplishment that is externally validated by appreciation and recognition, we are often blind to true self-actualization. Self-actualization may lead to external appreciation, and hopefully this doesn't blind us to the internal meaning.

Again, this could be considered subjective or objective. Objective perspectives on self-actualization as akin to destiny, as if we were born with a future that we are meant to reach - the philosophical example is an acorn is destine to be an oak. Or subjective - we have values and talents that shape what we become, but there isn't one "right" destination in our life's journey.

Often, when we truly self-actualize, our day-to-day life gives us a sense of meaning. I find that people who experience self-definition difficulties in depression have black and white and perfectionistic thinking: "I have to do something grand, and better than everyone else for it to be meaningful." How many people change the world? Very few, and not all of them find meaning in it. It is often more meaningful to make drops in the bucket - to touch those around us. Most of impact I have as a therapist isn't directly helping clients by some skill, advice or special words. The most powerful element of therapy is giving genuine attention which creates a milieu for healing, growth and actualization. If this helps, that is great. And if the client can then, in turn, help others, that is great. And if they can give more to their children, that is great. And if the therapists I supervise appreciate my attention and grow as a care provider, that is great. And they, then, can give more to their clients and future supervisees, that is also great. But the moment I need to see that outcome or get appreciation, I lose the intrinsic value and meaning of my work and becoming.